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I Love You Guy... - Jessica [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Jessica

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I Love You Guy... [Mar. 10th, 2010|11:20 pm]
Jessica
[Current Mood |accomplishedaccomplished]

Alright, so that didn't work out so well. Went on 4 dates with a guy and it seemed to be going well. Unfortunately, he turned out to be a weirdo. I mean I guess I should have known when he wrote on a napkin that he loved me...on our first date! He did say that he didn't "mean it that way", not sure how he exactly meant it, but alcohol was involved so I decided to ignore. Date number 2 was a lunch date and no alcohol and it went well. Date number 3 was a dinner/drinks date and again he mentioned something about love. Asked if he could be in love with me. I told him he doesn't know me so there's no way he can "love" me, but he said that what he does know about me, he loves. Okay fine.

After a few drinks myself, I agreed to have dinner at his place and stay there if it got too late because he lived an hour away from me, but on the couch and he in his bed. He thought it better if I got the bed and he the couch or we "cuddle" in his bed. So when having sober thoughts the next day, I texted him and told him I wasn't sleepover ready and didn't want to send the wrong message or set the wrong tone. He was good with that, so we decided on sushi then drinks and music at Carlo and Johnny's. This is where it gets interesting.

So, dinner was good. Had maybe 3 or 4 glasses of wine and sushi was awesome. Unfortunately, he had to keep touching my hair, my hands, my face and telling me how great I am. I know, you'd think one would love this right? No. So after enough of that we went to Carlo and Johnnys and parked in the lot for an apt complex, which had a sign that said Private Parking. We both drove there and both parked there, even though I pointed out the sign and said we shouldn't; he didn't have much concern so I just went with it.

Well once inside he proceeds to drink too much and get even more hands on. Kept telling me he was in love or asking if he could be, blah, blah, blah. He then asked if I would go to Nashville w/him for a week for work. I started to say something and he goes, "shh shh shh, yes or no." and puts his finger on my lips. (This wasn't the first time he pulled this either) So I said, "then no, I'm not ready for that type of commitment". So then he proceeds to ask if I'd go as a friend and I said mayybee, but probably not.

So now I've had to order a double captain and diet, after having 2 crown & 7s. He hears me order a drink and gets 2 for me! I'm thinkin ok because I'm going to need it to get through tonight. After that, he grabs my hand and demands we go dance. I didn't want to, but he begged. Once out there, I try to make the best of it. He thinks it's the greatest thing ever because "he doesn't dance, ever!" and he's doing it. He runs back to the bar to get his drink, come back saying he's not sure if it's his and of course is spilling it because it's full to the top. I take this as a cue to go sit back down. Thankfully he stays out on the dance floor.

Once I sit back down, I hear some guy saying how someone just took his drink right out in front of him. Wonderful. But as I'm sitting there, 2 black guys come up and one asks if he can put his jacket on my chair, so I let him. We start chatting and trading flirty smiles and winks. At this time, Matt comes back and makes it VERY well known I'm his. Making sure to rub me down and basically lick the whole side of my face. Just gross.

So once again we go through the whole how great I am thing and how much he thinks he loves me. I keep telling him to calm down, just relax, let's just sit and enjoy the music. Basically just trying to tell him to shut up in a nice way. I believe he asks me something like if I thought we'd be together or if I'm ready to make a commitment and he does the whole, "shh shh shh, yes or no." So again, I say, "Then no." I told him I've already been through a relationship before where the guy was in love well ahead of the game and held it against me when I wasn't and I wouldn't do it again. So he jumps up and says, "Well then I guess that pretty much says it all then doesn't it!" Ha! So I asked him if he was going to leave and he said yeah.

I figured maybe he's just going to go to the bathroom and wait a bit. After a few min I cash out our bill, which was $74! So of course I'm not going to pay for this date from hell. So I get up and go check to see if his car is still out in the parking lot or not. As I'm headed towards the door, he's walking back in. He storms in saying, "They took my car! It's gone!" So now I'm thinking, you fucking bastard! You were going to stiff me with the bill! I figure I better go check to see if my car is there and as we're walking out, the bartender waves us down and says we can't leave, we still have to pay out our tab. I tell her we're just going to go check on our cars (ha, yeah like that's believable). Of course she says we need to leave a credit card with her and so he proceeds to just toss his whole wallet at her and says that should cover it.

Thankfully, my car was still there. Serves him right for trying to walk out on me! So I move my car and head back inside. He's cashing out and I ask someone if they can find out who towed his car and where to. Matt asks me if I can take him home and I agree, even though I really didn't want to. I tell him we have to wait to find out where his car is. He demands to leave right then and I tell him no, we're going to wait. I was fed up by this point and figured we're going to start play by my rules now.

So once we got the info, we went to my car where I had to tell him to put on his seat belt. Of course he didn't want to and I told him, "well then we're not going anywhere. You want to ride with me, you have to wear your seat belt". So he yanks it here and there and finally gets it connected. I just wanted to be difficult since he was. As we're driving, he asks if I'm upset. Really?!?! Lol, so I said, "uh yeah I'm upset, you were going to stiff me with the bill!" He says, "No, you don't owe me anything." I told him, "I know I don't owe you anything!" and then asked why he left. Of course he denies wanting to leave me with the bill and says that he just wanted to go check on his car. I said, "really, right then just all the sudden got the sudden urge to check on it?". He sticks with his story and instead of arguing I just drop it. I just want to get him home and out of my life at this point.

So we're about to his house when he asks me to come in and cuddle with him. LOL, really?!? I of course say no and he doesn't understand and so I proceed to tell him that it just wouldn't be right and don't want to. He says, "well fine! Then you can just let me out here!" I told him no, that I was going to keep driving until he tells me where his house is. For one, wasn't sure if he could find his house with him being as drunk as he was and two, I felt like being difficult. So of course I pass it and he says, "Great, you just passed my fucking house!" And I said, "yeah and so now I'm going to turn around and I'll do it again if you don't tell me where it is".

Find his house, he gets out and goes inside. I just sit there in total disbelief. Did that really just happen? Ha ha, there's so many other little details that happened throughout the night. I just wish I had a video camera or a more photographic memory. I think there were some things that I just couldn't believe were happening so I deleted them from memory.

So of course I get a text from him the next day saying he's sorry and asking if he screwed everything up. Just told him that I was on my way to church and that I really didn't have time to discuss it. Told him that I saw the ugly side last night and wasn't happy with it and that I was still digesting it. He comes back and says that he had a bad day and that isn't how he normally acts and says sorry and blah blah blah. I don't respond. He then says that he just found out that he might have cancer and was going through a lot and even though it's no excuse he hopes that we can work it out. So I responded, "I'm sorry to hear that and hope it turns out okay and that being said, I don't think we're going to work out. Your at a place that I'm not and I'd have to constantly play catch up and I don't want that." I was afraid there'd be a texting war, but luckily he just said he understood and apologized once again.

Wow, just wow. It was so embarrassing. I kept getting looks from the bartenders like, oh you poor girl. At one point I just wanted to get drunk so that maybe I could have as much fun as he was having, but decided that this time I should really try to stay sober. Needed to be clear headed.

I gotta say though, I was really proud of myself. I don't normally stick up for myself like that. I have a tendency to sugarcoat things or feel bad for telling someone something they don't want to hear. I'm a people pleaser so at times it's hard for me to do what's best for me or say what I'm truly thinking and sometimes I end up regretting it. But I think in my quest to find something real, I've just become more certain with myself and if they don't like it then it's not meant to be. I wasn't nasty or rude about anything I said or did that night, I was just to the point and didn't second guess myself. Just felt really good.
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